Hey Anna, you little fucking bitch.
You may not be a real physical person that i can reach out and touch but Dr Jaffa and several others described you as a person so i'm going to go with that.
Why the fuck are you trying to get back inside my head? I'd literally (after 7 years of suffering) JUST reached a point where i was closing the door in your face but you. You and your fucking self centered ways pushed the door back open and threw yourself back in. I fucking hate you. Go away and leave me alone.
No? You don't want to do that? I didnt think so.
You've robbed me of everything anna; my morals, my passion, my interest, my hopes and dreams, my confidence, my sanity and even my friends and family. I'm fucking sick of you.
I can remember before i met you; i was so feisty, so confident, i didnt give a flying shit what anyone else thought about me. Now look at me. Im broken, im pretending to be someone i'm not, im uncomfortable being in my own skin and all the behaviours i engage in are now in some way or another self destructive.
I hope you know you've broken me? Do you?
I can also remember the days where i could eat a proper meal and sleep properly the night after but no. Not anymore. Now its; meal - excersize - no sleep - more excersize - repeat. Not even a fucking meal anna, a structured and diciplined excuse for a meal. Why won't you leave me alone?
Dont you dare try to tell me it isnt you that ensures i check each one of my ribs is still promenant before i try to sleep? How can i sleep when i feel so hollow and empty? You love to see me feeling like that though dont you?
Or what about when i look in the mirror... its you that looks at me and screams about how fucking ugly i am isnt it? Yeah, you know it.
I was only just starting to like myself... after what seemed like a never ending struggle but youre back. Youre fucking back.
FUCK YOU. LEAVE. ME. ALONE.
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